Photographs
by Joyal
Summary: One night, Wilhelmina decides to look back in her life, with the help of one very special photo album. Starting with Wilhelmina/Nico. R


It had been a week since I got informed that Mode was closing down, not just Mode, but the whole Meade Publications. Daniel said he wanted to move away and start a new life, I didn't get that. I poured everything to that place. And by everything, I really meant everything. My family, starting from my father, my sister Renee, my one daughter Nico. Then the love of my life Connor - maybe if I had just went with him in the first place I would have gotten the happiness I wanted from the beginning. I could have taken Nico along with me.

Sitting on my bed, I sipped on the wine I was holding, and then put it down to reached the drawer next to my bed. . I reached down the drawer next to my bed and pulled out a photo album. I'm not a fan of keeping pictures, 'cos I don't really have the time to look back at them and remember what had happened in the picture.

They say a picture speaks a thousand words, but to me, it doesn't speak or say of anything. All I see are still images, no memories flashing back of what happened. Well, sometimes a few, but only the little details that really got into me.

I opened it and the first picture was of Nico. The one failure in my life I regret the most. To think that a mother should always know where they daughter are, I don't even know where she is now, I tried calling her, but she seemed to have changed her number. That's my daughter gone then. In the picture she looked about 5 or 6, maybe 7, but I wasn't sure.

She was in her orange bathing suit, her smile was as bright as the sun behind her in the picture. She was in the beach, she held a beach ball over her head, it looked like she was going to throw it to the person taking the picture. Who I could remember was me..

_**Flashback:**_

_"Nico, stay still." I said steadying the camera, ready to take a picture. Nico did what I said and smiled for the camera. "Mommy, catch!" she squealed and threw the soft ball in front of the camera, it hit me of course. I took the ball and put on a serious face. I saw her face turned scared. Poor baby. "Sorry." she said, looking down on the sand. Still on my knees, I walked towards her and pulled her next to me and sat her on my lap. "For what? We're having fun.." I said and kissed her cheek. She smiled at me and kissed me back. "I love you.." she whispered in my ear and ran off to the beach, taking the ball with her. I smiled._

I turned to the next page. It was of me and Nico. This time she was about 14 or 15. It was taken by a professional photographer. We stood next to each other, my face emotionless, while hers painted another smile. The difference with this photo was that in this one, she didn't look happy, her smile was fake. She had her arm around me pulling me closer.

_**Flashback:**_

_"Alright Miss Slater. We're done.. We'll have it printed for you by tomorrow." the male photographer said before leaving the room. Nico gathered her stuff from the desk, and I put my jacket on, then my sun glasses. We were both in a rush, I had no idea why since we're both going home anyway. No words were said when we were traveling back to my apartment. She was looking out of the window while I did the same. "I'm sleeping over my friend's house. Just drop me off that store.." she said to me and the driver. I pulled a surprised face. "How come I didn't know this Nico?" I asked, "I'm telling you now, aren't I?" The car stopped and she opened the door. "See ya." she looked at me and didn't bother to wait for a reply, as she closed the door. I opened car window where she was stood in front. "Take care of yourself, just call me if ---" I didn't get to finish my sentence because she walked away, "Yeah, yeah, whatever Mom." _

That was the time I realized all had changed between me and my daughter. Maybe if I hadn't been so selfish, if I hadn't been so busy with my career, she would be here right now. Helping me get through my problems, like what mother and daughters do. Just the way she said 'Whatever Mom.' crushed me, though at the same time, it made me stronger.

Turning to the next page, something fell off, it looked like a sheet of paper. I picked it up from the floor and stared at it. It was a picture, attached to a note. The picture was of Nico and me, she looked like she was about 1. She sat on my lap while I played with her. She was looking up to me laughing, while I smiled at her. The picture was black and white, and it looked it had just been crumpled. I read the note attached to it.

_I am so sorry Mom. I never wanted this to happen to us. After all that had happened, I don't hate you, I never did. I might have said in the past that I hated you, but I was a teenager. Sorry for blackmailing you. I wish you happiness. Don't worry, I'd stay out of trouble from now on. _

_P.S I love you_

_-Nico_

Some say that saying _'I love you' _in another way like _'love ya, love you, ily, etc' _is not that same as actually saying that actual three words. I don't really care on how my daughter says it anymore, 'cos that was the first time she's said it to me after about ten years.

I took another sip of my wine turned the page. That was all the pictures I got of Nico. No graduation photos, no holiday photos, no birthdays, no everything a normal family should have in their photo albums. And that upsets me, because even though my family wasn't normal, I still wanted memories, which would remind me of the great times I had with Nico. But since there were no great times, there were no pictures.

* * *

**A/N: **_Here's a little Wilhelmina/Nico fic. It just came to my head when I was listening to Rihanna's song Photographs. I was meant to do a Wonnor one, but I got stuck mid way, so it turned out to be a Wilhelmina/Nico fic. _

**Anyway, R&R**


End file.
